CIA and FBI Find Men Responsible For Benghazi Attack

Tripoli–Two days after President Obama oversaw the return of three Americans, including U.S. Ambassador Christopher Stevens, killed in the Consul attack in Benghazi, members of the U.S. State Department, along with agents of the CIA and FBI, met with Libyan leaders in Tripoli. The objective of the meeting was to find the man or men responsible for the attacks.

Obama had said, via his weekly radio address, “I have made it clear that the United States has a profound respect for people of all faiths,” Obama said in his weekly radio address. “Yet there is never any justification for violence …. There is no excuse for attacks on our embassies and consulates.”

In response to repeated accusations from the Republican Party, including Presidential candidate Mitt Romney,

I’m outraged by the attacks on American diplomatic missions in Libya and Egypt and by the death of an American consulate worker in Benghazi. It’s disgraceful that the Obama Administration’s first response was not to condemn attacks on our diplomatic missions, but to sympathize with those who waged the attacks.

Obama has ordered a full-scale investigation. “I will not be soft on terrorism,” Obama said during a campaign stop in Las Vegas. “I will not allow Benghazi to become another Beirut.” This is an obvious reference to the 1983 Beirut Marine Barracks bombing; an event that would bring all the jihadist splinter groups together under one banner–Hezbollah.

The sudden about face from the Obama Administration is leaving Republicans confused. “Obama’s Cold War references harken to a day when Truman ran the Presidency and the buck stopped there,” said a senior Romney advisor. “We’ll have to see if Obama is trying to shape himself in these last few days before the election as another Truman, or if he will continue with Clinton’s foreign policy of lobbing a few missiles into sovereign nations and calling it foreign policy.”

“Obama is pulling out a card from the Republicans,” an Obama aid said. “People want quick justice, just like Reagan after the discotheque bombing in 1986. Obama is willing to get his hands dirty.”

Knowing the likelihood of singling out the attackers on the Consulate building attack as a sketch to the bad side of worse to none, Obama himself came up with the plan now being implemented in Tripoli.

Along side Libyan leaders, Senior State Department officials toured Abu Salem prison. Several men facing the death penalty under the newly installed Sharia law were interviewed by intelligence officers from the three agencies. The number one question was whether or not the men would be willing to stand trial for the attack, be found guilty, and executed. The rationale by a State Department official who spoke on condition of anonymity was “they are already going to be put to death, we might as well give them the opportunity to save face before their nation.” The interviews lasted about three hours.

Three men facing the death penalty for the rape of a young girl have agreed to the tribunal which will be held next week in Tripoli. In accordance with Sharia law, the United States will pay diyya to the families of the three men in exchange for their cooperation.

“This should appease the stupid, war-hawk, Neo-Cons,” an Obama spokesperson said in Tripoli.


2 thoughts on “CIA and FBI Find Men Responsible For Benghazi Attack

    • Every once in a while I get quite snarky and just want to poke fun… What scares me though is whether or not this could have been (in the past) or might be (now or in the future) a viable plan in an incident like this.

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