Released Taliban Will Become Drone Targets

cia-drone-killing-program-in-pakistan-winding-down-1401354264-6536Washington D.C.–Hoping to counter quick criticism of the Afghans for Bergdahl trade, a senior officer with the CIA’s Drone program leaked information that these Afghanis would become targets for the U.S. Drone operations. Remaining anonymous because he wasn’t officially allowed to speak to the operational plans, the agent said, “We’ve had nearly twelve years to sneak tracking devices into the rear ends of these Afghanis. We know that they will quickly return to their previous networks. Our hope if that once they reach Qatar, they will reach out to high level terrorists.” When asked if the President would still continue the drone attacks in the face of mounting criticism from civil rights groups, to Americans, to Amnesty International which has said that some of the attacks could amount to war crimes, the agent said, “The President doesn’t care what we do. We have carte blanche to wage war as we see fit. Plausible deniability if the modus operandi of this Administration; it is why the President is always out fundraising.” The CIA agent also stated that the Administration wouldn’t rule out using the drones in Qatar “if that leads to the most kills.”

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